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Suck it up and ask for what you want!
By elaine | March 28, 2010
Yesterday I attended the 2nd day of a publisher’s conference and sat down for lunch at a table with 8 interesting people, most of whom I had never met. During lunch we got to know each other and I discovered two award winners, a model, a news personality and even a woman who had just purchased a 46 foot yacht moored in Florida! Always pays to strike up a conversation!
As we were caught up in talking at the table, I noticed that the desserts had already been set at each place – alternating a piece of chocolate fudge cake with a piece of carrot cake – and for the first time I saw that the carrot cake was smack dab in front of me! Now I have nothing against carrot cake, but come on…there’s no contest between chocolate and carrots! I wanted the chocolate cake and was bemoaning the fact that I had certainly sat at the wrong place. So I appeared to have two choices: I could enjoy the carrot cake at my place or steal a piece of chocolate cake from one of my neighbors! Then I thought of something else and I tapped my spoon on the side of my water glass. When I had everyone’s attention I said, “Just checking, but would any of you prefer to trade your chocolate cake for my carrot cake?”…fully intending to get laughed at or met with stunned silence. Instead, the woman on my left returned with “Actually, that would be great. I was thinking of how I could get a piece of the carrot cake!” So we switched and both got the results we wanted. The man sitting on my right leaned over and whispered, “Wow – good for you. People always seem to hesitate to ask for what they want.”
What a good lesson that was for me. So often we find ourselves in situations that could be made even a little bit better if we just speak up and ask how it can be made better – how we can get what we want or need. As a member of a military family, are you willing to step up and ask your kids to calm down and behave, if even for a minute, or ask the neighbor if they’ll shovel the snow for you, or your mom to take your daughter to gymnastics? Why are we afraid or uncomfortable to ask others for help? Next time – suck it up and ask for what you want! Who knows…you just might get it.
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